Beauty is in the eye of the Industry

Well what can I say it’s that time again where its season time in the South Africa film and commercial industry. What does this mean for me?  It’s time for me to diet my self into a coma/size 0 and grow about 2 feet.  Ha ha, though I joke about this, this is reality I face on a daily basis tryna break into the industry.  It’s a constant struggle to compete with 6 foot skinny tall ass models, we all know the camera puts on ten pounds( well that is not entirely untrue) and for these models they look great on camera. My  5 foot slightly standard physique doesn’t not travel very far on the camera, even if they do zoom out. Ha ha. Now as insecure as I might sound, comparison is not the way I choose to define myself. Yet in this industry that's  what it's all about. Just recently I was booked for a casting for a Woolworths ad, in the description it stated that they looking for fresh faces( shotgun), and then carried on to state that they should have fit bodies and cast in bikinis(fail). As much as I would have loved to attend the casting, from experience, I had been to many such castings and knew that I was not suitable for the description. In order be suitable I had to be at least 6foot and skinny, because that is in actual fact what they looking for. I aint no model. Now my body is not terrible I happen to have an average body type but average don’t work in these adverts. I mean when last did you  see an average shapped girl in a bikini ad for Woolworths? Yep that’s what I thought never. And its shame because I aint that skinny( nor do I desire to be)  but it does play a role in my self confidence. How could it not?And if i attened this casting i would of put myself in an akward position where i would doubt my capablities, when all I want is some air time on the tv to be regconised for the talents that i do have. Yeah I wana be famous and I believe I have the talent, yet  the only opportunities I get are those that are out of my reach, unless I conform to the idea of beauty set by the industry. SO unless I wana be the 'fat girl' on Tv or movies, I gotta get my ass into shape so that my talent gets recognized. Even if one looks at Celebrties who are talented and have average bodies that we have all come accept and love. They have scaled down their bodies to becoming the ever so popular "skinny Hollywood girls". Example: of this is one of the most talnted girls, Lea Michele from GLee, I thought she had an amazing body in Glee but recently I saw a post of were she lost alot of weight.

  Lea Michele( After)

Lea Michele(Before)

Though they can pat themselves on their backs for achieving the weight loss they still get criticized in the tabloids for losing weight ie. Is she Too skinny? Is she on Drugs?  They question her reason for losing weight.  Why? Her agent probably advised her to loose weight if she desires other roles that does not consider her to be ‘the fat girl’. And in all honestly her agent is probably not wrong. I then look at my situation and wonder what i have to in order to be successful in Hollywood. So the question is how badly do I want my dream?.............. Answer:  I could live with Anorexia.